The Brittany Diaries

Well sweet Jesus! I'm still alive!

2008-12-29T22:29:00.001-05:00

Who'da thunk it? Huh. I'm back. =)

So, I'm feeling much better today.

2008-10-14T19:00:00.003-04:00

My side still hurts a little bit, but I can actually lift my arm without wanting to scream. I actually felt good enough that I took my dog for a walk. He did pretty well until we came upon 2 squirrels and then he nearly ripped my arm off!

I have a date tomorrow night. Well, I guess it's a date. Regardless, I hope it goes better than the date I had on Friday. Worst date ever in the history of the world. I won't go into details, but let's just say it pretty much looked like he hadn't brushed his teeth since the day he was born.

Work hasn't been wonderful this last week. I'm just glad that it's over and I don't have to go back until Sunday. I'm hoping that when we get back, things will be better, but I'm not hopeful. For one, P.S. will be off until freakin' December. What's up with that? I don't know how I'll function without him! The only plus side is that Drac will be back. He was off our last two nights of mids, and it just wasn't the same without him!

Other than that, I really don't know that I have anything else to say. Annnd.... out.

I think I hurt more than just my leg yesterday.

2008-10-13T20:07:00.002-04:00

My side is hurting really bad. Even when I lift my arm. I think I might have pulled a muscle or something when I dropped my bike. =(

On a happy note, tonight is my last night of midnight shift.

Had my first motorcycle related injury today.

2008-10-12T21:27:00.002-04:00

I knew when I woke up this afternoon (shut up, I'm on midnight shift. I'm allowed to be lazy) that it was going to be a bad day. We decided we were going to go ride some today, so I managed to get the bike out of the garage all by myself. Everything was peachy until I got down to the end of the driveway.

For this motorcycle class I'm taking to get my license, you have to wear boots. So I bought a pair of boots on Friday and I decided today I would wear them and get used to them. Big mistake. When I went to go turn out of the driveway, my foot got caught between the shifter and the foot peg and made me lose my balance. So I dropped it.

Thankfully, because I was going so slow (and have freakishly long legs), I was able to catch myself and keep from going down with the bike, but when the bike went over, the foot peg caught me on my other leg. I've now got a nasty bruise and there's a bump that's formed where I was hit. It hurts pretty bad, but at this point, I'm considering myself lucky that I didn't get seriously injured.

Guess who road her motorcycle on the real road?

2008-10-08T10:09:00.001-04:00

That's right. I did. And I went faster than 20 mph. Jealous? You should be. And guess what? I'm doing it again tonight.

I think I might love Howie Mandel.

2008-10-06T17:58:00.001-04:00

WTF is wrong with me? He's sexy.

Phoebe <3

2008-10-06T16:48:00.003-04:00

I've always loved kids. Always. I worked at a daycare center for nearly 4 years, and even though the kids got on my nerves daily, I would have done anything in the world for either of them. But I have never loved anyone like I love my little PP.

The very first time I held her, she was 2 days old and it scared the bejesus out of me. She seemed so fragile, so tiny. It was absolutely terrifying. What was even more terrifying was the first day I babysat her. I've always been good around the little kids next door, but they're also older. I usually do better with kids 1+. I'd never watched a baby so young before.

She's now a little over a year old, and every day I see her, I think I love her just a little bit more. So, my darling PP, even though you're too young to understand now, I want to thank you for letting me love you. And thank you for loving me too.

My boys.

2008-10-04T20:20:00.002-04:00

So I've made references in previous posts, so I figured I would give you a general information about my boys. So you won't be confused. Hopefully, in the event they ever stumble across this blog, they won't be angry that I blogged about them. After all, they're a big part of my life as I spend quite a few hours per week with them. But in order to protect their privacy, I'm going to resort to fun nicknames.

P. Diddy- I mentioned him previously in a post. He's my supervisor, and while he sometimes drives me up a freakin' wall, he definitely makes life interesting. As previously mentioned, this nickname was just something stupid I called him when I first started at the PD (though never when he was within ear shot) as I was never really sure WHAT to call him. To this day, he still doesn't know about the nickname.

P.S.- He's also my supervisor, but only when P. Diddy is off (which is like... all freakin' summer!). When I first started at my job, I was completely and utterly terrified of him. I'm not sure why. Now, he's one of my favorite people in the planet =)

Bud Lite- In the entire 2 years I've been at my job, he's the one I know least about. Truthfully, sometimes I forget he's even there, but I have to honestly say, I don't think I've ever had a beef with him! He's a nice guy, just quiet!

Drac- Named for the fact that we tease him about looking like Count Chocula. Keep in mind, he doesn't REALLY look like that crazy cartoon, but it's fun all the same. Especially being that I don't think he likes it too much. Haha.

Dennis- No, his real name is not Dennis, but he reminds me of that crazy cartoon character, Dennis the Menace. Not because he's a pain in the ass or anything, but because he seems to be a little mischievous.

Sam- Yes, that's his real name. But for some reason, I think he'd probably be okay with me blogging about him. He's my partner in crime. I spend more time with him than I spend with any of the others, as he's forced to do his 9 hours in the same room as me! Haha.

So there you have it. In the event I ever mention these guys, maybe you won't feel quite so out of the loop.

Cheeeeesecake.

2008-10-04T19:46:00.003-04:00

That's what I'm making for my boys. You know... the ones I work with. One requested a cheesecake topped with mandarin oranges. And because I'm such a nice person, I'm complying. But ooooh, I bet that is going to be NASTY! And they probably won't even eat it.

But I'm also fixing a plain one. And I got a can of cherries to go with it. Again, because I'm such a nice person. But they probably won't even eat that one either. I think they've made plans for ice cream cake tomorrow, so if they don't eat it, I'll pack my little cheesecakes up and bring them back home! SO THERE!

Also, I'm nearly ready to ride my motorcycle on the road. You remember... the motorcycle that is my boyfriend. I actually rode it on the real road today. But it was not even a full mile. Because I am a wuss. But it won't be long before I'm ready to tackle the real REAL road. You know, the one where you go over 20 miles an hour.

This post is for you, P. Diddy*.

2008-10-02T17:25:00.003-04:00

In the event that you ever stumble across this blog, this is proof that I don't always talk bad about you, no matter how often I call you a bastard at work.

Today was fairly uneventful. I worked, as usual. Whoever decided working during the hours of 7-4 was a good idea should have a size 11 boot shoved firmly up their ass. Bastards. The only plus side of the day is that while I was supposed to work the shift alone, my supervisor made it a point to come in and keep me company.

Most of that time was spent with me serving as a look out while he "meditated", but I was grateful for the company anyway. He's really not so bad to talk to, especially when no one else is around. (See that? I just complimented you. In a back handed kind of way, but it was a compliment none the less!)

Thank you for your help today, P. Diddy. You know I like when you come in to keep me company. No matter how much I try to convince you otherwise. =)

* So because I'm kind of a dork (simple, as he once put it), when I first started at my job, I thought it was hilarious to call my boss P. Diddy. Not to his face, of course. And unless he stumbles across this, he'll never be any wiser. But in an effort to keep his identity private, I've decided to revert back to that nickname for the purpose of this blog.

Why all the hate against slightly smushed bread?

2008-10-01T18:55:00.002-04:00

Does slightly smushed bread taste different than fully fluffed bread? I mean seriously? I grabbed a loaf of bread off the shelf at Wal*Mart, and unfortunately, the only loaf left in the kind I wanted (Double Fiber, anyone?) was smushed. Just slightly. My madre commented on it, the cashier at Wal*Mart commented on it, and I'm pretty sure my boys at work will comment on it tomorrow.

So really... is there anyone out there in blog land that has experiences with this kind of phenomenon?

Bye bye Hair. Bye bye frizziness...

2008-09-30T14:07:00.002-04:00

Sing that to the tune of the poligrip or whatever commercial that plays repeatedly, if you please.

I have cut my hair. I love it. I really, really do. I feel like it makes me look grown up and PRETTY. What do you think?

Before:

After:

PEEEEEEEEEEE. EEEEEEEEES.:
Ellen looks REALLY REALLY pretty today. Is she wearing more make up than usual?

I am not feeling very nice today.

2008-09-28T23:17:00.001-04:00

Also, I'm wondering if my desire to suddenly change my nasty attitude is really me wanting to be an overall better person, or me wanting to ensure that in the event something tragic happens to me, people comment on how great of a person I am.

Guess who is totally not psyched for work?

2008-09-24T12:35:00.003-04:00

That's correct. Yours truly. Who decided that working was a good idea? Because really, money should just be free.

However, yesterday, I did a nice thing, in keeping up with my attempt at not being a nasty hooker (Of course, my good deed was more fueled by the fact that I got 4 hours of comp time than actually doing the good deed!). I worked last night for a couple of hours because someone had called out sick. See how nice that was?

It's a good thing I don't have a social life. *Le Sigh*

Ways in which I have tried to be a good person this weekend!

2008-09-22T11:15:00.005-04:00

As previously stated, I'm doing this thing where I try to stop being such a nasty person! I thought I would chronicle the ways in which I attempted to do just that this weekend!

*So there was this girl that came to the wedding, and I never really cared for her too much. I felt like she stole my cousin from me when we were younger, which resulted in me and said cousin no longer being "best friends". But Saturday night, I was very nice to her! And she was nice back! And I requested to add her on myspace!

*I worked on Sunday for a girl at work so she could have the day off! And that's a big one for me, being that I had gotten pretty drunk the night before! But I made a promise to her and I followed through! Go me! =)

*....

I guess that's really it. But it's not too bad, right? RIGHT?

Curse you, Blogger!

2008-09-22T10:06:00.004-04:00

I had my pictures in the last post, and I just now realized that they did not post! What the hell is it with this site eating my posts?! Anyway, here they are...

The lovely couple walking down the aisle. Married at last!

Removal of the garter.
Big brother and little brother dancing. (Funny enough, little brother is actually the bigger brother here!)

Me dancing with the groom.

The beautiful cake.

The entrance into the reception hall.
Mr. and Mrs. at the head table.
And Before...Vs. After

Pictures, pictures, and more pictures!

2008-09-21T17:44:00.002-04:00

That's right. I survived the wedding. So did my phone (haha. Long story). Let me just say first and foremost how gorgeous Kristin was last night. She was absolutely gorgeous. As Natalie (my little cousin) said, she looked like a Princess.

I, on the other hand, looked a hot mess by the time the night was over. Thank you, copious amounts of alcohol. Pictures to follow...

Ahh, the price one pays for beauty.

2008-09-19T17:30:00.000-04:00

So, Adam and Kristin's wedding is tomorrow and in preparation for that festive occasion, I had some work done today. Specifically in the form of a new haircut (just bangs, don't freak out) and color (OK, so it's not new. I just had it re-highlighted). Whoever designed the stupid cap that you pull little strands of hair through is a jackass. Who decided that thing was a good idea?

Wow! Two blogs in one day? Crazy. More updates to come tomorrow regarding the wedding, as well as pictures.

I am a bad blogger.

2008-09-19T07:38:00.006-04:00

Tsk to me for being neglectful. In my defense, when I'm on midnight shift, the only thought on my mind when I'm home is how tired I am.

I've made an executive decision that I need to stop being such a nasty person. Well, perhaps nasty is such a strong word. But I don't know that I'm the nicest person either. You see, I'm a grudge holder. And I shouldn't be. I get annoyed with people who have things that I don't have (not material things, mind you. I don't think I've ever hurt for a material possession.)

Some ways I've tried this past week to be a nicer person:

* Some of the stuff that goes on at work makes me not such a nice person. Specifically the fact that it's like high school with the drama, times 10. But I'm trying to be nicer. Which includes even covering shifts for other people. See how nice I am?

* I didn't cuss any of my boys out this week. That may seem like something small, but trust me, that is no easy task for me.

* I made contact with a guy that I was talking to and wished him a happy birthday, even though he made an executive decision that I wasn't even worth a proper explanation for no longer corresponding with me. (No surprise, but I didn't get a response).

I really do want to become a better person. I think a lot of my issues in relationships (friends and otherwise) has to do with my sour outlook on life. Which really, I have nothing to complain about. I have amazing parents who would do anything in the world for me. Absolutely anything. They've supported me in every decision I've made, even if it was hard for them to do so (Police Academy, anyone?) I have any amazing friend who has listened to me bitch and gripe about everything under the sun for the last (almost) 2 years, and I still know that no matter what, I can always go to her.

And even though I may not always like my job, I realize I should be thankful that I have one. There are plenty of people in my area that cannot say the same.

My motorcycle is my boyfriend.

2008-09-15T19:33:00.003-04:00

Or girlfriend if you're one those sexist bastards that believe all forms of transportation are female. (Even though I admit I've referred to the bike as "her" a time or two. Shh) I've got a little over a month before I can ride legally, but I'm getting better! I can actually take off without nearly being thrown off! Lovely.

Again, midnight shift a bitch. And subsequently not my boyfriend. It's pretty terrible to have to be awake during those hours when your body knows it's supposed to be sleeping. It probably doesn't help that we take turns "meditating" because everyone knows that catching a cap nap makes things a jillion times worse. But such is the life I lead.

While my motorcycle is MY boyfriend, Howie Mandel is my mom's boyfriend. Or so she wishes. Even when he's all bald and stuff. Gross.

Oh midnight shift, how I loathe thee.

2008-09-14T17:54:00.002-04:00

It's been a few days since I updated. Apparently, Brittany doesn't blog on her weekends. (Or it was the simple fact that I didn't really have anything to blog about? Naaah...)

Quick rundown of the last few days. Thursday after I got done with work, we headed over to the Harley shop in Seaford. It was fairly uneventful, except for the fact that there was an incredibly cute dude that was working there, and I think I loved him for all of one day.

Until Friday, when we saw Camo Dude at the beach. I actually made Camo Dude stop so that I could take his picture. Yeah, that's how good looking he was. Let me just say, the plan was that next year, I would ride my own bike down to Bike Week, but after seeing all those freakin' motorcycles? Yeah, I think not. I would hate to get run over.

Yesterday, I had to work. I covered for a coworker. I almost rode my bike to work, but I got down to the end of my driveway and chickened out. I'm such a loser =(

Today was probably the best though. I took the bike out and practiced on it. I really think I'm getting better. It won't be too long before I'm riding on the road rather than sticking to the parking lot. Watch out world, because Here I Come!

Thank the Baby Jesus it's my Friday.

2008-09-11T16:08:00.003-04:00

Phew. What a long ass week! BUT! It was worth it. And you know why? BECAUSE I GOT MY AMAZING MOTORCYCLE JACKET! That's right. Be jealous.

Calling out of work tomorrow sounds like a good plan.

2008-09-10T18:49:00.003-04:00

You would think that the best shift to work would be the one where you would have a normal life, but HOLY GOD I HATE DAY WORK! Thank the baby Jesus that there's just one more day left of this terrible shift. THANK YOU BABY JESUS.

The problem with calling out is I'm terrified I'll miss something exciting. Because I'm nosy. The first step of recovery is admitting the problem. So there you have it.

Aside from the fact that it's more like a soft core porn, I really enjoyed the pilot of "True Blood" on HBO. I know, I know. Given the fact that it's on HBO, the porn-like plot should be expected, right? HBO loves boobies. Or is that Cinemax? Anyway, it's a pretty good TV show.

Annnnd... that's all I got.

Guess what? I got a motorcycle.

2008-09-09T18:02:00.003-04:00

Yeah, be jealous. But really, aside from the whole... riding it thing, I think the best part is purchasing the accessories. Such as my beautiful, sexy, amazing, wonderful helmet. Let me show you it.
I thought it was rude that my momma didn't even save me the pleasure of opening the box. But that's okay, because I got to show everyone at work my beautiful (sexy, amazing, wonderful) helmet. And I'm pretty sure they were jealous. Even the dudes. They just refuse to admit it.

So what's the point of this Deal or No Deal TV show? And why is Howie Mandel bald? My mom just asked if I thought he was good looking. Even bald. I had to fight to keep from vomiting. No, madre. I do not think he is hot. I don't think he would be hot with hair either. Sorry.

Let me just tell you, I am newly obsessed with the Fruit 2 0 strawberry water. It's absolutely amazing. A little sweet, but it's yummy none the less.

My new motorcycle jacket should be here in a few days. So in the event that it arrives while I'm at work, I hope my mom waits for me to get home to open it. Because I like packages. I don't get them enough. But I'm pretty sure it's about nap time for me. This getting up at 6:00 shit is for the birds. (Did I get that saying right?)

Ask and you shall receive.

2008-09-08T12:38:00.002-04:00

Wow. Amazing timing on my part. I just stumbled across some pictures of Britney from last night and HOLY JESUS SHE LOOKS AMAZING! *Tear, tear* I'm so proud of my girl for getting her shit straight.

Thank you Mama Mary's for creating such a delicious pizza crust.

2008-09-08T12:31:00.002-04:00

True, I'm supposed to be staying away from pizza altogether (Dr. Phil would not approve) but I just can't resist the temptation of such a tasty personal pizza.

You know what's even better than a yummy personal pizza? Not having to work until 3:00! That's right! Of course, when I agreed to switch shifts, I did not account for the fact that getting off at 12/going back in at 7=stupid, STUPID decision. But I must soldier on.

As much as I enjoyed my movie last night, I almost wish I had tuned in to the VMAs to see my girl Britney. I've heard she looked amazing, and believe it or not, I haven't even seen any pictures. Of course, I'm too lazy to YouTube, but I'm sure eventually I'll stumble upon some pictures.

In other news, there's this girl that I kind of love. And her name is Phoebe. She is just over a year old and she has completely stolen my heart. Unfortunately, she's on vacay with her parentals this week and I don't get to see her =( Curse you, Vacation Gods.

Movie Review

2008-09-07T21:44:00.004-04:00

"Death Sentence"

Starring:
Kevin Bacon
Kelly Preston
Garrett Hedlund
John Candy

Premise:
After a man's son is killed in what appears to be a robbery, he goes all vigilante on their asses in an effort to get revenge.

Review:
There was definitely some unnecessary gore. But truthfully, what action movie today doesn't have a ridiculous amount of gore? That's right. But all in all, I have to give it Four Stars out of Five. The beginning is pretty sad, so if you cry easily, you should probably keep tissues on hand. But it was a pretty great movie!

My new candle. Let me show you it.

2008-09-07T19:46:00.007-04:00

Jealous? You should be. I won it during a game at a Bridal Shower. It means I'm the smartest. Unfortunately, it isn't the best smelling thing in existence. I was disappointed. But only slightly, because it was free.

As previously mentioned (in the above paragraph), I went to a Bridal Shower today. I don't care if that's supposed to be capitalized or not. It is because I said so. The theme was a Hawaiian Luau as the bride and groom will be going to Hawaii for their honeymoon. Pretty, yes? Unfortunately, I almost think her name is spelled incorrectly.
The entertainment today was absolutely hilarious. Unfortunately, I can't post the video. Because it would be terrible if it turned out to be a YouTube hit! But still. It was wonderful. And there are no words to describe how great it was. So just take my word for it.

On a more serious note, I really am happy that my cousin found such a wonderful person to share the rest of his life with. I think his mother was a little apprehensive at the beginning of the relationship because of the age difference, but really, she's absolutely perfect for him.

Curse you Sirius Radio Tech Support!

2008-09-06T19:24:00.006-04:00

Baaaah! Let me just tell you! At work, I don't have many pleasures. Really. We have one outlet and it's in the bathroom, so we have a radio plugged in there. Unfortunately, the radio only gets one station and it is muy boring! So when I realized I could listen to my Satellite radio via the internet, I was muy excited! Until the day the music died =(

Okay, it didn't really die. But my internet radio surely did stop working. So tonight, I called tech support. And can you BELIEVE that the guy was trying to put the blame on me?! Really! Who does that! Yes, Mr. Tech Support Man, I'm well aware that the little "squiggly" box down at the bottom (which I am smart enough to know is called a "Captcha"!) needs to be entered correctly. Do you think I was born yesterday? Whore.

Anyway, because he was severely stupid, I now have to wait an hour before I can attempt to log on. But gosh darnit, you had better believe that by tomorrow morning when I go to work, I will have my satellite radio!

ETA:

Me-1/Sirius-0

I win =)

What a wet and wild Saturday afternoon!

2008-09-06T17:14:00.001-04:00

Courtesy of Tropical Storm Hanna! Of course, it's more wet than wild. Although I did almost get blown away by the wind. True story. Or slightly exaggerated. But for real, we went to Chili's for lunch (Have you ever had their shrimp? It was the hand breaded jumbo shrimp and boy were they good. Piece of advice though: don't add salt. I tried to salt my french fries and HOLY COW! was that stuff salty!) and of course, while we were eating, the rain and wind picked up! So when it was time to leave, I offered to go pull the car up so that the parentals wouldn't get drenched. I know, I know. I'm probably the world's best daughter. Don't be jealous. Anyway, on my way to the car IN MY CROCS! (Who thought it was a good idea to wear shoes with holes in them during a Tropical Storm! Oh yeah... I guess I did...) I almost slipped on the slippery slick pavement. And it was not fun. But I didn't so my bones are all firmly in tact.

Anyway, moral of the story is, it's wet outside. And I'm cold. But I have my favoritest pajinkies on, so all is well in my world =)

New Beginnings

2008-09-06T16:23:00.005-04:00

This is the story of Brittany, as told from her point of view. This blog will chronicle her (mis)adventures in life, love, and all that other good stuff. I hereby certify the contents of this blog to be a (mostly) true account of the trials and tribulations of your average 20-something super hero (or not. Hey, a girl can dream!)

This is my story...